Would A Manatee Brake 4 Me?
So as I’m walking out to my car after work, I see a mom getting into her car with her daughter. As they drove away, I saw a bumper sticker on the back of the car that read:
“I Brake 4 Manatees!”
Well, what the hell makes YOU so frickin’ special, Ms. Mom? Ever seen a manatee? Those fuckers are huge! If I saw one pressing the crosswalk button, you can bet your sweet ass I’d be coming to a screeching halt and giving that fucking sea cow the right of way.
P.S. Listen, lady. I didn’t mean to spill salad all over your son. You didn’t have to yell OR leave me a douchey tip. But, it’s not my fault he’s skating around on his roller-sneakers in a restaurant.
October 3rd, 2007 at 6:16
What an inane bumper sticker and hell yes a manatee would definitely get right of way. Or maybe manatee is code for someone, not that I’d favour being labelled a manatee (or sea cow *L*).
As for roller-sneakers in a restaurant, perhaps you should have a sign at the door saying ‘if you’re on wheels use a drive-thru’!
October 4th, 2007 at 8:32
Perhaps she meant to put the bumpersticker on her boat but was not bright enought to distinguish between her “Beware of the Child on Board” van and her tugboat.
March 10th, 2008 at 11:56
next time throw out some “road hazards” like crutons to trip his little ass