Don’t all of you servers hate it when you’re running around and some fatass lady thinks that her glass of sweet tea isn’t full enough and wants you to get her a brand-new one when she damn well knows that glass is about as full as it can get.

Last week, I had a woman complain that she had been sitting at her table with an empty glass for 15 minutes and demanded that I “get her a brand new glass of sweet tea this instant!”

Here’s a diagram to show you just how “empty” her glass was:

This is no exaggeration. The bitch’s glass was over 80% full. When I explained to her that whenever I would walk by, I saw an empty glass and didn’t think she needed a new drink she said, verbatim:

“Well, I just figured you could read my mind.”

If that’s not the definition of an idiot, I don’t know what is.

This post goes out to the fat tub of lard that ate nearly all of his Imperial Dinner (the biggest thing on the menu) and then wanted his money back because “the filet wasn’t to [his] liking.”

You liked it enough to stuff all but two pieces into your mouth AND to eat all the rice, noodles, vegetables and chicken.

Maybe I should come to the Wal-Mart you work at, buy some fucking toasters, break the damn things and then return them because “they weren’t to MY liking.”

Oh, and he paid with a credit card. So if anyone knows a Michael E. Rossmannith, give him a swift kick in the balls for me.

This woman came in the night before Thanksgiving with a very sour look on her face. She went up to the bartender/manager Yuki and said “I’m here to pick up my to-go order. Where is it?”

Yuki: “Umm…ma’am…we haven’t gotten a to-go order yet tonight.”
Woman: “I gave you my name, address and phone number.”
Yuki: “Alright. I’ll go check and see if anyone took your order and didn’t tell me.”

Sure enough, no one had taken a to-go order for this woman. Yuki even checked the caller ID in front of her, but she was not convinced.

Woman: “I’m in the middle of a MILLION things and all my family wanted was some SUSHI!”
Yuki: “Okay, ma’am…well…here’s a sushi menu if you’d like to order some sushi right…”
Woman: “Whatever!”

It was then that Yuki got the idea to ask the woman:

Yuki: “Did you call another restaurant by the name of [another restaurant]?”
Woman: “What do you mean ‘another restaurant’? Isn’t this [another restaurant]?”
Yuki: “No. This is [our restaurant].”
Woman: “Oh.”

I wouldn’t have had a problem with the lady mixing up the stores, but the arrogant-and-proud-of-it attitude is what made this woman a bitch. A bitch with a family that probably goes hungry quite hungry.

Backstory: I’m driving to work today at 3:30pm and I pass a bank telling me it’s 56 degrees. That’s in the afternoon. End of backstory.

A family walks in and complains that it’s “too dang cold in this here restaurant”. They then order a round of drinks and leave before the drinks get out to them because “it’s too cold for their baby and it was cold when they came last time”.

Your complaint may have been valid, sir, if you were wearing something other than A FRICKIN’ T-SHIRT AND JEAN SHORTS.

Firstly, anyone wearing jorts should not be taken seriously. Secondly, anyone that wears shorts and a t-shirt out and dresses their small child as if it were the middle of August does not deserve to even have a child to dress wrong.

The mom, of course, was wearing a skirt and a blouse.